Vitals:

Pi-e's Commission Info: [link]
Official Commission Journal: [link] (new artists added sporadically; note me if you want to be listed)
Etsy Shop: [link]
Black Cats vs ravens: [link]
FAQ: [link]
draw fo *pokie-boo!!
Pimping: *Nut-Case=tkay*DF16~EviEnchantress
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THIS IS A VERY LONG POST.

Well, I decided I would replace horribly pessimistic journal with a more light-hearted journal! Let's begin our adventure into....*LINJALAND!

Adventure 1: Our First Dildo

First off let's make it known that dildos are really fucking expensive. I had been searching on the internet for cheap jelly dildos to use for our infamous drilldo project and I found a couple of $8 dollar ones but the shipping was like $30 bucks so Lin and I decided to scrap internet buying and just drive into the heart of San Francisco to procure our elusive first dildo. We pick a really shitty day to drive into the city; its raining and there's traffic everywhere. That's ok though because we're totally stoked about buying a dildo. After about an hour and a half later we make it into the city and begin the search for parking. HAH, we are so naive... We end up going in a giant rectangle for about 20 minutes looking for parking and nearly hitting every pedestrian because apparently the middle of an intersection is where you're supposed to cross when there's oncoming traffic. Anyway, we end up having to park in a pay lot so we dish out $7 bucks to a Russian guy and set out looking for Good Vibrations, a local sex shop.

After about 10 minutes of walking in the frigid wind and rain we realize we have no idea if we're going in the right direction since we only know what street the damn store was on and not the actual address. After a little bit of asking around we finally get directions and make it to the store doors. Lin and I peek in and see it's full of lesbians, so like good best friends we take two large steps apart from one another before entering. Apparently 2 large steps isn't large enough because everyone..thought..we were lovers x__x

After the initial lesbian moments subside we begin looking around for an inexpensive jelly dildo to use. Ok... so we browse, browse, browse-- what the fuck!? Everything is either a vibrator, a cock ring or $50+ >:[ Things look grim for Lin and I until we see our dildo, the red marbly "Bullseye" with a gigantic head meant for G-Spot stimulation. That's the one! We quickly procure our dildo and shuffle to the cashier, but unfortunately we were caught up in the fray of other SF denizens looking for dildos and end up on a mini tour of the store looking at silent and strong vibrators >__> It was actually very interesting, but we decided then and there nothing of the sort was ever entering our vaginas. Anyhow, we get undistracted by sex toys and go to buy the dildo and at the cashier stand the woman asks us "have you two ever used silicone before?". Lin and I pause and look at one another "...like, on..each other?" The woman stares back patiently "uhm, no, we're not that way! I mean, uh, COLLEGE, yeah it's for...college" Smooooooth. Lin and I were giggling-- we didn't wanna seem to out of place, especially in a sex store in SF, but it was just so funny. The woman immediately understood we were just curious college students, apologized and gave us a discount for school, yay! I never knew being a college student meant you got a discount on sex toys...

Anyway, on the way home the dildo got waved at people who cut us off, used as a bludgeoning device on one another, used as a dog toy ( our dogs LOVE it), used to "shoot" people we didn't like and used to wake up people who were asleep. We even use the "pyew pyew pyew" noise whenever we wield it! Thundercats would be ashamed at how we "Dildo HOOOOO" around the house. This dildo is awesome, we love it!

Adventure 2: Of Dead Cougars and Sewers

About two months back at the beginning of Winter Quarter Lin and I get some information on where a dead cougar is in the hills behind my house ( or to you other san jose people, up in Mount Hamilton). We get this information at around 6pm so its already dark outside, but that doesn't stop us from packing up and driving for 45 minutes to find this thing. Turns out driving in the mountains on a one lane road isn't very good for dead cougar retrieving so we end up having to turn back and make plans to go out searching the following morning.

The following morning means Monday before school starts so we get up bright and early, put on our "hiking" gear ( that means converse, jeans and fuzzy lumberjack hats) and set out. We get to the park where the corpse is supposed to be located and begin hiking, following a very crudely drawn map. After about 20 minutes we find the spot where the bones are supposed to be-- somewhere across from a drain pipe and over a hill. We look around and see... many, many hills which are all adjacent to drain pipe. What the hell, we'll search them all! This search included about an hour of jumping, scrambling, falling, sliding, getting soaked in creeks, hitting trees and staining our clothing, but it was fun! Anyway, we can't find a damn single bone until ta-da, I find a femur stuck in the creek! We figure the bones must be near by so we begin scrambling about looking for them, but much to our dismay we can't find another bone.

We decide we better call it a day and start our commute to school when curiosity peaks one more time and we look over one more hill... which leads to a sewer. Being the geniuses we are we decide we'll baseball slide down a fat ass hill into the basin of a sewer. Its a beautiful sewer, mind you, but after getting into it we realized something-- we couldn't get out. everything was too steep, too wet and too decayed to help us out. Whatever, we're looking for a cougar so we shrug the inconvenience of being trapped at the mouth of a sewer and press onwards. We get to the mouth of the sewer and lo and behold there are the bones! No skull which disappointed us, but we managed to get at least half a skeleton into a garbage bag before trying to attempt our daring escape.

It is very difficult climbing out of a sewer and very smelly at that. Everything was water logged and decayed so whatever I tried to stand on would collapse underfoot. After about 15 minutes of hopping about on random branches and garbage I finally give it one last lunge and manage to climb up a vertical shoot of the sewer and... get stuck u__u;; It was all mossy concrete and after having climbed up about 4 feet to even get into the mouth of this drain I realize I can't go u because my shoes have no traction. I sit there for a few minutes while Lin tries to figure out a more sensible method of escape before I make a sprinters dash up part of the shoot and jump out onto the side of the hill to grab some roots. I try to use these roots to pull myself up the hill but they keep falling out so it takes about another 3 minutes to finally make my way up to level ground. Once i'm out it's time to free Lin so I anchor myself and and lower my hand. Lin has less problems getting out and manages to find the ONE ROOT I didn't tug out during my escape. We climb up the rest of the hill, have a good laugh and then realize something... we dropped our shit into the fucking sewer and left it there. WTF. This results in Lin having to go back in and get pulled back out.... Finally we have everything we need and make the hike back down. On the way back down from the mountain we realize we're totally late for class but that it was very worth it because we have half a dead cougar in my backseat...

...or so we thought.

My dad ruined everything with this simple line, "Honey, that's not a cougar, that's a deer."

T____T


(the end of linjaland pt 1)

* Linja= Lin and Aja combined. People often refer to us as one person because we're always together.